What are the biggest reasons couple split up? Fights about money, infidelity, even having kids can cause so much stress that it rips couples apart. But sometimes, the things that drive a wedge between us are more subtle.
We’ll start with too much DIGITAL communication and not enough face-to-face communication. According to an Oxford University study, couples who talk more through things like texts, emails and Facebook are less satisfied with their relationships. Experts say it’s because electronic communication is unemotional, and no amount of Emojis can replace hearing the tone of someone’s voice. Jenev Caddell is a psychologist who says, the more you use digital communication, the more room there is for miscommunication and misinterpretation.
Another breakup trigger: Grand romantic gestures. That sounds great! So how can it lead to a break up? Because a once-a-year trip to Jamaica can’t makeup for the other 51 weeks of neglect. The National Marriage Project found that couples who express everyday affection and do small things for each other all the time are less likely to divorce. Psychologist, Dr. Leslie Becker Phelps says, if you haven’t nurtured your relationship week after week, your partner won’t care about grand gestures. They’ll seem hollow. It’s like trying to put a band-aid on a gaping wound.
One last subtle relationship killer: Apologizing too much. If you have to keep apologizing over and over that means you’re making the same mistake over and over. And what works better than apologizing is compromising. That’s according to psychologist, Dr. Keith Sanford. He says, most people would rather their partner give up some of their power and contribute more to the relationship than say “I’m sorry.” Saying “sorry” means nothing if you don’t address the root of the problem and change your behavior.