Forget a promise ring or moving in together. These days the way to show the world you’re in a committed relationship is to share a social media account.
Sometimes couples think, “Well, why should we BOTH comment on Facebook about the same restaurant? Why don’t we just combine accounts?” For others, sharing a social media account makes it more interesting. Because while the girlfriend takes pictures of sunsets, the boyfriend takes pictures of classic cars. They see the world differently, and that makes for a richer profile.
And there may be a psychological benefit to sharing an account. Couples report feeling closer to one another when they share an account. It’s a way to bond. And a study found that couples who talk about their significant other on Facebook report being happier and more secure in their relationship.
But some psychologists say that bonding is going too far when you share a social media account. A University of Kansas study found that over-sharing on Facebook causes partners to feel less intimate because there’s no sense of discovery. You’re not learning anything new about how your partner thinks or what their day was like.
And relationship therapist, Dr. Suzana Flores says sharing a social media account kills independence, which is something everyone needs. And in her practice, nine out of ten times, when a couple has a joint account, someone has trust issues. She says, sharing an account is less about bonding and more of a reaction to insecurity and jealousy.
Her advice? Don’t share a social media account because you need to see yourself as an individual. The relationship shouldn’t define you. And if trust issues are what’s driving you, share passwords instead. That shows you have nothing to hide.