A growing number of mothers are talking about “gender disappointment.”

That’s the term for the sadness some women feel when they learn the gender of their baby. And surveys show that as many as 1-in-5 expectant mothers are disappointed about the sex of the child they’re carrying.

One woman we read about was hoping her second child would be a girl, because she already had a son. So, when an ultrasound revealed she was having another son, she says she wanted to cry!

According to psychiatrist Dr. Louann Brizendine, that’s a common symptom of gender disappointment. She says a lot of mothers feel like they have to “fake” a reaction when they get the news of their baby’s gender, and then, the first chance they have to be alone, they cry.

She says the good news is that most women get over their disappointment by the time their baby’s born. But for some, that temporary feeling of sadness can lead to feelings of guilt and shame, or even depression!

And Dr. Brizendine says the problems are magnified if you leave the gender of your baby a surprise until delivery. Because if you spend 9 months getting your hopes up for a boy, and it turns out to be a girl, you’re going to have a hard time accepting it.

That’s why our expert says if you find your feelings of gender disappointment lingering - before or after delivery - you need to do something about it. First, understand that you’re not alone. But, you should consider talking to a therapist, who can help you get to the root of why your baby’s gender is so important to you.