- You don't challenge each other. Healthy relationships require a willingness to challenge and be challenged. If everything your partner thinks or does is fine with you, they may think you don't care. That their life doesn't interest you enough to get involved. But it's your duty to stay involved and question each other's thinking and actions.
- You and your partner have become an amoeba. If you two have become a single person with the same interests, activities and friends, you need to get your own lives, quick. If you don't, one of you will feel smothered by a lack of variety and a lack of individuality.
- One person selflessly lives for the other. According to psychotherapist Morrie Shechtman, selfless devotion is boring and a burden on the person you're living for. It can lead to cheating. Everyone wants to be appreciated, but most people want someone who's independent and has a life of their own.
- Everything centers on your children. Many couples use kid-obsession to avoid intimacy.
- You don't have meaningful conversations anymore. If the only question you ask each other is, "how was your day?" and all you get back is a list of complaints, chances are you're not really communicating.
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