Here are four things that guys wish women knew about them. This comes from Shaunti Feldhahn, who interviewed over a thousand men for her book: For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men.
- We’re insecure. Basically, we’re afraid we’re not cutting it in life – at work - AND in our role as a husband. The fix? Regular support and encouragement from our significant other. Not just “You look great” flattery. We’re talking about the genuine article – like, “Thanks for listening when I needed to vent yesterday” or “Man, you make me laugh!” The more props we men get at home, the more secure and confident we become in ALL areas of our life.
- We feel the burden of being the provider. It doesn’t matter how much or little a man makes, or whether his wife makes more. We feel we’re EXPECTED to take care of our family and that expectation can make us feel stressed, because it’s been hard-wired into us over centuries. So, ladies, say something like: “Thanks for cleaning out the gutters. I couldn’t have done that on my own.” That way, he’ll know you feel taken care of physically and emotionally – even if he’s NOT taking care of you with his paycheck.
- What else do men wish women knew? That we enjoy romance – but don’t think we have the skills to pull it off. The fix: Redefine what romance looks like. For example, say your husband asks you to go with him to the hardware store. To you, it may feel like you’re just running errands together, but HE may look at it as a great opportunity for some quality couples’ time together. So, try to find the romance in everyday occurrences – and suggest spontaneous dates. Maybe you can go for a coffee date after the Home Depot run.
- The #1 thing over 1-thousand men surveyed wish women knew: How much we love our wives. We genuinely appreciate the companionship, the kindness, the laughter, the nurturing, and the cooking. Everything you bring to the table. We just aren’t very good at TELLING you about our feelings.