Try the "Rules of Courtly Love" to Keep Your Relationship Going.

Medieval times weren’t all plague and torture.  There were some good things too. Romance bloomed in the Middle Ages, as a response to the oppressiveness of arranged marriages. And “The Rules of Courtly Love” were invented as guidelines to help romantic partners conduct themselves in these new relationships. Organic Style Magazine has come up with some tips on adapting those twelfth century pointers to the twenty-first century. Here are a few to follow.

  • First, don’t assume a status quo. If your bond isn’t deepening, then it’s weakening. You’ve got to work to keep a relationship going. So if you’re getting too comfortable, it’s time to light another fire and heat things up again.
  • Next, love and selfishness don’t mix. Be generous, not only with gifts, but with time, attention, and kind words. Holding back doesn’t make you the strong one, it just builds a wall that keeps romance out.
  • Also, if your partner lets you down, don’t seek revenge. If he leaves the toothpaste cap off the tube, and you decide to record Oprah over his Yankees tape in retaliation, this probably won’t ignite any romantic sparks.Stay on the high road and don’t be surprised if your partner eventually climbs up to join you.
  • On a similar note, don’t feel you always have to have the last word. You may win the argument, but your relationship loses. You don’t have to be a wimp or even agree with what your partner is saying. But you can listen and ask questions instead of attacking. Romance shouldn’t be a battle. Remember - you’re both on the same side.

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