- Start by doing something that removes you from your safe routine. Put yourselves in a new environment it can be anything from traveling to another country where you don't speak the language, to a night at the opera. Because you're in an unfamiliar situation, you're now each other's comfort zone.
- Call each other by your proper names. It sounds stupid, but how often do you use your spouse's name when you're talking? Hearing your name gives you a shot of positive reinforcement.
- Anticipate your partner's needs. If you know your wife grabs a cup of coffee every morning, have it waiting for her when she wakes up.
- Take more pictures of the two of you as a couple. Especially if you have kids probably all your pictures are of the kids, or of you as a family. Take some of just the two of you.
- Finally, try to get your speech pattern in sync. This means try to echo words that reflect your partner's dominant sense. For example, if they use phrases like "I see" they're a visual person. If they use, "I hear what you're saying" they're an auditory person. If you use the same dominant sense when you talk, your partner will feel like the two of you are mentally matched.
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