Ladies, do you remember a book back in the ‘90s called The Rules – which was a code of dating conduct for women? The premise is that men are biologically programmed to be the pursuers. And they may be flattered by a woman's pursuit, but they won't fall in love with her, because there's no challenge. Guidelines from the book The Rules included things like:

  • Don't talk to a man first.

  • Don't meet him halfway or go Dutch on a date.

  • Don't call him, and rarely return his calls.

  • Always end the date first.

Well, the book has been updated for the world we live in now. The NEW title is The New Rules for the Digital Generation. And here are a few of the instructions:

  • Women shouldn’t text, email, or Facebook “friend” a man first.

  • Wait at least four hours to answer a text – that's the MINIMUM. And the older you are, the longer you should wait.

  • Never text after midnight. The authors say that part of The New Rules is to teach men to respect you, which means setting boundaries.

  • Keep your emails brief and infrequent. And always leave him wanting more because long or frequent emails are a big turn-off.

  • And finally, the authors of The New Rules say there are only 2 mistakes you can make in online dating. The first is not to try it. The second is to contact the man first.

But do women who are actually dating online think of these rules?

  • An online dating survey found that 79% of women wouldn’t wait for a man to contact them first.
  • When it comes to replying to text messages, most women think they should make a man wait a little. But most would only wait half an hour, not four hours.
  • So, do the authors and the women in the survey agree totally on anything? Yes. Almost every single one said that if a man canceled on them twice, they’d never go out with him again.

What do you think? Does the man need to always be the hunter? Or is that old fashioned? Can a woman make the first move?

Lesson Expert

Jennifer Boller

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