Here are 4 ways to get closer as a couple:

  • Say I love you, and mean it. Lisa Thomas is a licensed marriage therapist – and she says we shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ out of habit. If we do that, it starts to lose it’s power and ends up meaning nothing. Thomas says instead, say ‘I love you’ when you’re struck by how much you do. Those words give people a true sense of security so use them wisely.
  • Surprise each other. That doesn’t mean you have to plan an elaborate trip – just stick a sweet note in her handbag – or send him a romantic song from iTunes for a buck. When you do that, your partner is more likely to do the same.
  • Be happy for each other. A UCLA study found that couples actions during happy moments are more important than what they do during hard times. That’s because it’s actually easier to comfort someone and be sympathetic. Misery really does love company. But when something good happens to your partner, it can bring up feelings of jealousy and competitiveness. But happy couples are happy for each other’s success. And couples who ignore each other’s high points are less satisfied, less trusting, less intimate, and at greater risk for breaking up.
  • Have rituals. From Sunday breakfast together – to a phone call on the way home. Routines are crucial for couples because they build a sense of connectedness and security.

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