Ladies: Do you want to have a better relationship with the man in your life? Here are some tricks to help you communicate better with men, according to relationship therapist Dr. Karen Lewis:

First: Say “thank you” more often. Dr. Lewis says a lot of women have the attitude: “I cook and I clean, so why do I have to say ‘thank you’ every time my husband helps do laundry?” But studies show the happiest couples make each other feel appreciated, even with a simple “thanks”.

The second way to better communicate with men: If you just want to vent, say so. Dr. Lewis says testosterone makes guys want to fix things, with their hands or with advice, so, when they hear you complain about a hard day at work, for example, their instinct is to offer solutions. That’s why our expert says if all you want is a sympathetic ear, say so before you start venting.

Also: If you give guys a chore, give them a deadline. Our expert says when a guy hears something like “take out the trash,” or “fix the cabinet door,” his instinct is to add that task to his personal “to-do” list, and get to it when he can. The problem is: If you need the cabinet fixed before your parents visit on Friday, he’s not going to know that unless you tell him!

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