Why? Because saying "yes" too often can hurt your happiness!
That’s the latest from clinical psychologist Susan Newman, author of The Book of No. She says that 9 out of 10 women have trouble saying no, especially to loved ones……So, they end up doing things they don’t want to do – and don’t enjoy doing. So, here are 3 new ways to say "no":
First, there’s the no-need-to-explain "no." That’s good for turning down requests for little things, like the neighbor who wants you to baby-sit while she runs errands. Try saying "I’m sorry, but I just can’t" – and leave it at that. The more excuses you tack on, the more it’ll look like there’s wiggle room in your schedule, and the more they’ll try to change your mind.
Next, there’s the maxed-out "no." That’s for when you’re already stretched too thin, and you’re asked to do a big project, like running the church raffle. Say something like "I’d really like to help, but I just don’t have the time to do the job justice." That makes it clear you’re being supportive, but that the project will be more successful if someone else is in charge.
And the final response every woman should learn: The positive-spin "no." That’s for the pal who wants you to write a cover letter she needs. Say, "Thanks for thinking of me, but I just can’t. Besides, you’re just as good at cover letters as I am." You’ll be able to ditch the guilt and give her the confidence to step up to the plate and do it herself.
If you’d like to go further, the book is The Book of No by Dr. Susan Newman.