Just about everyone who becomes a parent agrees: Once you have a baby, everything about your life - and your relationship – changes, permanently.
The change is so profound psychologists even gave it a name: “Baby Quake.” Because having a baby completely shakes up your relationship, and if you’re not careful, can ultimately drive you apart. In fact, in a recent study of more than 1,400 people, nearly one quarter of the couples split up by their child’s 3rd birthday.
More facts from the study: Two-thirds of new parents end up with worries about their relationship that didn’t exist before they became parents. For example, a stay-at-home parent can feel isolated and unappreciated. And if only one of you is working, the breadwinner may feel stressed about having to bring home all three of you. And one-quarter of couples wish they could get some “alone time” together, and take a break from the constant worry about making sure their baby is safe, healthy, and happy.
Also: New parents often neglect each other and their relationship, and start defining themselves as parents - instead of partners.
And it goes even deeper than that because almost half of new moms worry that their partner is no longer attracted to them.
What’s the takeaway?
Schedule couple’s time once a week – and stick to it, even if you just hire a babysitter for two hours so you can take a walk together. Because when you’re both completely focused on your child, your relationship can get left in the dust, and it can only be saved if you spend time together.