Breaking up in the so-called “Facebook Age” can be as difficult as conquering a cocaine addiction.
That’s the word from Dr. Marianne Legato, a cardiologist who says new technology like Facebook makes it too easy to obsess over an old flame. Think about it: All you have to do is peek at your ex’s Facebook profile or Twitter feed, to see what they’re up to or constantly check your phone to see if you’ve missed a call or text from you ex.
Dr. Legato says the problem is that each time you do that your brain gets a squirt of dopamine, the neurotransmitter associated with cravings and addiction. And recent studies have shown that when you engage in obsessive behavior over an ex, your brain reacts in the same way addicts react to craving cocaine!
So how can you avoid obsessive behavior and get over a breakup in a healthy way? Here are some tips from therapist Tina Tessina:
First: Stop calling or texting your ex. In fact, leave your cellphone locked up at home if you have to. Because the more you try to contact your ex, the stronger your obsession grows, and you’ll prolong the negativity of the breakup.
Also: Figure out what the “take away” message is. Tessina says when you focus on the lessons you learned from a relationship, that’ll redirect your mind away from the pain you feel.
Finally: Spend time with family and friends. I know it sounds obvious, but research shows that when you’re around loved ones, your brain produces more oxytocin, the feel-good hormone. That’ll counteract any unhealthy feelings you have when you obsess about your ex.